Two years ago today I began working on Reptile Apartment because my dad was my inspiration in connecting with the natural world. One year later I launched Reptile Apartment and garnered a whopping 75 visitors! Today, we enjoy over 4,000 visitors from around the world each and every month on average searching for information on the captive care of reptiles. I have personally acquired some incredible friendships which span the globe as well. I have managed to fail in numerous parts of my life.
Today is the birthday of my best friend and my dad. My best friend taught me how to write (I still manage to mess this up just ask some of my more educated friends). My dad taught me how to live a life worth living however. I wanted to write some wordy post on here (to show off my skill) and make a big deal out of today in remembrance.
A book arrived today, coincidentally I know but somehow fitting in a way. How Animals Grieve written by Barbara J. King who is someone I respect and admire. She examines how animals; well how animals think and yes express grief. I could see this as some ‘sign’ that the book would arrive today but it may just be a coincidence.
Something about my dad; he was always a ‘simple man’ not of mind but of desire. All he wanted/needed was three hots and cot. I know this from visiting his familial home. When he brought me there (to bury my grandmother) he took me to a corner of the literal log cabin and asked me
“You see that corner”
Pointing to a corner of the building where I looked as dust flew through the shafts of light here and there as it crept between the cracks in the walls as this ‘home’ was literally made of hand hewn logs.
“Yeah” I replied nonplussed.
“I was born in that corner”
Born in that corner, no doctor, my grandmother squatted and gave birth in the back hills of Kentucky. That made me realize, there were times he didn’t have the so-called simple life of three hots etc. Becky said we should ‘get Dad a proper urn.’ to which I replied…
“I think he likes the one he is in, it just fits. A simplistic plastic box. He was never one for fancy shit.”
My dad reminded me when I began doing reptile presentations about the times when I was a kid that I would sit on his lap and pronounce the Latin dinosaur names for him. He would sit at the top of the stairs when I did my presentations in front of hundreds of kids and adults and just smile. He never said to me
“I’m proud of you”
He didn’t have to, we just knew. I think today hit harder than most because of Barbara and her book. My dad spoke at length of animal behavior and how humans interpreted such. So without going to maudlin (like I haven’t already) and with your permission I’d like to relay a story which was inspired in part by my little buddy Steele who asked his mom.
“Does my Bearded Dragon love me back?”
I do think our animals (pets) have a compassionate capability to reflect our own. My dad didn’t care for reptiles at all. We would discuss for hours on end my reptiles interacting with me in various ways. When I picked up my first dog I was to ever truly own in my life Brutus; he was a Bullmastiff crossed with a Rhodesian Ridgeback my dad would later tell me
“You owned that dog as soon as you walked in”
Brutus and I spent over 10 years together before he was unable to raise himself from the bed and enjoy his life as a dog. I trained Brutus in German, English, and French when the dog trainers I worked for at the time said to me
“He’s too much for you”
My dad taught me to read the language of the animals as Barbara speaks about in her book How Animals Grieve but it wasn’t just mammals that he taught me about, it was animals in general. They truly do have a language, reptiles experience pain, happiness, and a host of other emotions I am sure of it. The real question is, are we hearing that message? What are your thoughts?
PS: This piece was not peer-reviewed or edited as are most of our pieces so forgive if you can any mistakes. In case you haven’t figured it out by now, if you’re reading this, you need to purchase How Animals Grieve because it’s a genius piece of literature!